You are NOT a bad mom if...
You vaccinate or don't vaccinate your kids
There is a lot of mixed research out there and it's a personal decision that every mom has to make on their own. Whatever they decide, it's wise to assume that they did it BECAUSE they love their kids.
You occasionally let your kids eat junk food (ie Mcdonalds, cheetos, spaghetti os, etc)
As long as you make an effort to give your children a healthy balanced diet loaded with lean protein, and fruit and vegetables it's probably OK if you occasionally let them have something "iffy".
You spank or don't spank your kids
Every parent has to discipline their kids how they see fit. As long as it doesn't cross into abuse or lack of discipline (which can be equally detrimental) than it's probably fine.
You occasionally yell at your kids.
You spend all day every day with your children and as long as you typically enjoy them and try to communicate with them with patience, it's completely understandable that once in a while you might loose your patience.
Your kids watch morning or evening cartoons/movies.
Take some time out of each day to turn everything (except maybe music) off and let them be creative. Also, take some time out of each day to read to them... stimulate those little minds. That being said, don't feel guilty of a little out of each day is spent on their favorite show. It happens.
You don't or do do extra curricular activities
These days people keep their kids busy. Sports, clubs, lessons, school, play dates, etc. If you can give your kids some amazing extra curriculars that they love... than GREAT, as long as you don't "over-work" them and stress them out. If you can't... don't worry. They will be OK. There is no where in the Bible that says "Thou shalt play sports and do girl scouts". It's OK. It's just as beneficial to read together and visit some friends.
You homeschool or you public school
Every kid is different. Every family is different. As long as you take some time to be as involved as you can and get to know their teacher/other kids in the class than you are doing fine. On the other side... as long as you give your kids time to be kids and enjoy other kids their age than homeschooling is wonderful too. Neither option is for everybody and God calls us to do both.
You are structured or unstructured
Remember when you see that mom who says "I can't come over because my child has to go down exactly at 2pm for nap"... don't judge them. Some kids REALLY ARE that way. Some Moms also just need that to keep their sanity.
Remember when you see that mom who says "I can't come over because my child has to go down exactly at 2pm for nap"... don't judge them. Some kids REALLY ARE that way. Some Moms also just need that to keep their sanity.
On the other side, if you see a friend that seems to be flying by the seat of their pants... it's quite possible that they have kids that can handle that, and that it works for their family. Maybe a schedule stresses their whole family out and makes everyone miserable.
If your kids can read by the time their 3 or if they are right on par with public school system
Not everyone has a "teacher's personality". If these people don't have anyone to help them than they feel really overwhelmed and lost. Judging them or their kids just makes it worse.
Not everyone has a "teacher's personality". If these people don't have anyone to help them than they feel really overwhelmed and lost. Judging them or their kids just makes it worse.
On the other hand... some people are natural teachers and tend to assume that it comes natural to everyone. Don't judge these gals... they are not trying to "outdo" you by having their kids reading before school. They just enjoy teaching.
If you brag about your kids or "trash-talk" your kids
Every mom has days of both. Bragging about your kids can come off as just as rude or condescending as spewing negativity can come off bitter and ungrateful. We all have moments of pride/insecurity and we all have moments of frustration. Just smile and nod. :)
If you spend all year planning your kids birthday parties or if throw something together at the last minute (ie homemade boxed cake and grandparents)
Birthdays are fun but they are not that important. Each family celebrates differently and your kids will adapt to your personal style. Cake and Presents don't define love.
If you keep a clean house or if you are a little disheveled
The world doesn't hinge on the cleanliness of your house but you should really try to keep it safe and health-hazard free.
If you keep a clean house or if you are a little disheveled
The world doesn't hinge on the cleanliness of your house but you should really try to keep it safe and health-hazard free.
Now comes the part I hate... there are a few things that should make you "re-think" your parenting.
If you never consider what you feed your kids.
If you are giving your 10 mo old soda.... please take a moment and think about what that could do to their tiny bodies.
If you never spend quality time with your kids.
I bet they miss you.
If you do drugs around your kids
Need I explain this?
If you don't teach your kids morals/values.
Trust me... you don't want the "world" to do this for you. They won't do a good job.
If you don't take responsibility for your kids.
Set an example.
If you are lazy.
I'm not talking about the "little things" or "weak moments". We're all human. I'm talking about require your spouse to do all the work in the household or allowing your kids to be unfed or unbathed so you can surf the internet or hang out with friends. Their well being is important.
If you verbally or physically abuse your kids.
Hurting them doesn't teach them anything except anger.
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