I remember writing you a letter, before you were born. I was a ball of pure anticipation. I was naive and I had no clue what being a mom really meant. All I knew is that I'd love you and do my best by you. I had no idea what love was until I looked into your tiny face.
I planned on an all natural labor and delivery. I imagined exactly how it would be, planned out every detail. Then reality happened, and it all changed. It was the most difficult experience of my life. I had to be induced, you were wrongly positioned, and no matter what the midwives did, you just didn't want to come out! Eventually, after nearly 3 days of hard labor, they had to "suction" you out. I just praise the Lord that you were healthy, and you didn't end up being a c-section.
When they finally got you out all the nurses and midwives gasped.
"He's Huge!" they said.
You were 9 lbs 7 oz. In the world of first babies you might as well have been the incredible hulk. All I could think was,
"I am a Mommy!!!" as tears overflowed down my cheeks. I held you to my bare chest and whispered into your ear, over and over, "I am your mommy!" Daddy, by my side, crying and stroking your cheek. Marveling at the incredible perfection that was you. A person. A whole person.
Everyone warned me about how much work being a mom, could be, but what they left out is how worth it, it all is. I had never been so exhausted as when I was struggling to keep my new big baby boy fully fed; constantly either nursing or pumping. It never really felt like work, though. I just remember feeling this new level of strength, because I was doing it all for you.
Life with you has been such a blessing. I have had the indescribable joy of watching your personality unfold. You are such a distinct individual who has known who he is since that very first day, in my arms. Each day growing and expressing new levels of yourself.
You are brilliant and kind. You have always expressed a sense of empathy that isn't supposed to exist in babies and small children. Placing your chubby little hand upon my cheek when you would see me cry, and even before you had words, you do what you could to comfort me. Other children crying inspired you to wish to care for them. You beam bright with a nurturing spirit. A mind for control and order, but a heart to love!
When you're sister came along you didn't once exhibit jealousy. You didn't claw for my attention or resent her. You assume the brother role with strength and grace. It's inevitable that you don't always display patience, or self control. You and Gabby spend a great deal of time together, which leads to good days and bad days in your relationship. You, however, on a whole, have this way of teaching her and helping her that brings a proud tear to rest in the corner of my eye. 
I often wonder what you will accomplish in your life.
Will your mechanical strength lead you to a career in engineering or architecture?
Will your love for guiding and helping lead you into teaching?
Will your compassion draw you to medicine?
I do know one thing, what ever you choose, you will be great. Not because of anything that I've done, but because of the spirit the Lord has blessed you with. You are a fighter!
I am honored to be your mother and I look forward to spending the rest of my life as such. I am so proud of you, Gideon. With any luck, you will grow to be a man of great integrity and strength, just like your dad.
Love,
Mommy
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